SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 22nd, 2015
NEHEMIAH, PART 3
BUILDING WALLS, RESTORING LIVES - HANDS AND FEET!
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
This week's Touching Base is Week 1 of the Restore Prayer Event Workbook found here.
Mark Kotchapaw
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Thursday, February 19, 2015
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Touching Base - Part 265
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 15TH, 2015
NEHEMIAH, PART 2
BUILDING WALLS, RESTORING LIVES.
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
God is a Redeemer! Do you know anyone that needs to experience this? The basic meaning of the word redeem refers to a transfer of ownership. It was originally a word from the world of commerce. But as we look at our text today we will see that a commercial word was adopted by the Jews to refer to the wonderful work that God can do in our lives. God is a Redeemer!
This week is part 2 of our new series. If you missed last week please either pick up last week’s TB or listen to the message to get the necessary backdrop to understand context.
Big Idea: God is a Redeemer!
Text: Nehemiah 1:5-11
V10- Note how this word “redeemed” is being used. Who are the redeemed? How are they described? How were they redeemed? What redemption event is Nehemiah referring to? Check out Exod. 6:6; Deut. 7:8,9
This exodus event is the great OT picture of redemption. God transferring ownership, by freeing his people from slavery, the whips and brute strength of the Egyptians, and setting them free to be the people they were called to be. This historic event has served to provide a rich backdrop for understanding God’s ultimate act of redemption seen in Christ. Check out 1 Pet 1:18,19, Gal 3:13.
What do we learn about redemption from Nehemiah’s prayer?
Redemption does not mean we get an exemption from “messy”! (“mess” is living in a way that is contrary to our title as the redeemed.) Note the disparity between their title and their experience. They are the redeemed but looking pretty “messy” at this point - exiled, discouraged, disobedient!
One writer has said, “In my lifelong study of the Bible I have looked for an overarching theme, a summary statement of what the whole sprawling book is about. I have settled on this: “God gets his family back.” From the first book to the last the Bible tells of wayward children and the tortuous lengths to which God will go to bring them home. Indeed, the entire biblical drama ends with a huge family reunion in the book of Revelation.”
But even when God gets his family back… messy can still erupt! The same is true in God’s redemptive work in our lives through Christ. Our redemption does not mean we won’t, at times, find ourselves living in a season of disobedience. It is messy because as the redeemed we are to be walking in the ways of God. Check out Galatians 6:1,2 on how we are to handle messy Christians.
Got any messy chapters in your walk with Christ? What do those chapters look like?
Praying for anyone who is a Christian and they are in a messy chapter?
Redemption means holiness matters.
Whether in the Old Testament or New Testament a follower could look back and see the date, the event that was the moment of their redemption. However a moment in time results in a journey of a lifetime where God works out His redemptive purposes in our lives. Think of the purchase of a house. There is the transfer of ownership - redemption. But then what often happens is that new owner goes from room to room – “redeeming” each room - aligning what that room looks like with the new owner. God works out his redemptive purposes in our lives - room by room, day by day, and chapter by chapter. This is a lifelong journey. Holiness matters.
One writer has said “…there is the tendency to overlook the fact that the NT as well as the OT sees redemption, or salvation, in terms of the total human situation.”
We have other theological words that expand on this- sanctification, transformation, renewal.
Eugene Peterson points out that “the root meaning in Hebrew of salvation is to be broad, to become spacious, to enlarge. It carries the sense of deliverance from an existence that has become compressed, confined and cramped.” It is a working out of new ownership!
Because the children of Israel are redeemed, they are now being held to account for their disobedience. There are all kinds of rooms in the “house” that do not reflect the new ownership. This will involve specific repentance for the decrees, commands and instructions that they have ignored. Note v6, 7. Our holiness matters to God because we are a redeemed people.
The same is true in the NT. Jesus walks through the “house” He owns and challenges us to align each “room” with who He is, not the previous owner. He desires to work out his redemptive purposes in every area of our lives.
Got any locked doors into rooms you know you need to allow God to redeem? In title He is the owner but in practice we need to acknowledge that fact.
Have you opened any doors lately where you could say that something is deeply broken but is being fixed?
Praying for anyone these days, praying that they would unlock a certain door?
Redemption is based on the work of God.
Whether we are referring to that moment in time when God redeemed us and transferred our ownership to Himself or to the ongoing process of redemption, God’s strength and power are essential! Note how v.10 refers to God’s strength. Also note v6,11. Nehemiah realizes that unless God “shows up”, nobody is getting fixed.
How many of us could identify a situation (personal or involving someone else) where you would say “unless they experience the power of God, the work of God, they may not get free!”
What happens when we fail to realize how necessary God’s strength is in redeeming people’s lives? This may apply to someone coming to faith or walking out their faith (one answer is that we can push people away because our desire to help actually hinders).
Because Nehemiah realized his need for the power of God, what did he do? For a clue, what one word summarizes what Nehemiah is doing from v.5-11?
Here is how I would sum up our big idea - God is a Redeemer Who is in the mess, challenging us on issues of holiness, and Who is present with power!
As you pray this week, engage with God our great and awesome Covenant Keeper (week 1) and Redeemer!
Mark Kotchapaw
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
NEHEMIAH, PART 2
BUILDING WALLS, RESTORING LIVES.
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
God is a Redeemer! Do you know anyone that needs to experience this? The basic meaning of the word redeem refers to a transfer of ownership. It was originally a word from the world of commerce. But as we look at our text today we will see that a commercial word was adopted by the Jews to refer to the wonderful work that God can do in our lives. God is a Redeemer!
This week is part 2 of our new series. If you missed last week please either pick up last week’s TB or listen to the message to get the necessary backdrop to understand context.
Big Idea: God is a Redeemer!
Text: Nehemiah 1:5-11
V10- Note how this word “redeemed” is being used. Who are the redeemed? How are they described? How were they redeemed? What redemption event is Nehemiah referring to? Check out Exod. 6:6; Deut. 7:8,9
This exodus event is the great OT picture of redemption. God transferring ownership, by freeing his people from slavery, the whips and brute strength of the Egyptians, and setting them free to be the people they were called to be. This historic event has served to provide a rich backdrop for understanding God’s ultimate act of redemption seen in Christ. Check out 1 Pet 1:18,19, Gal 3:13.
What do we learn about redemption from Nehemiah’s prayer?
Redemption does not mean we get an exemption from “messy”! (“mess” is living in a way that is contrary to our title as the redeemed.) Note the disparity between their title and their experience. They are the redeemed but looking pretty “messy” at this point - exiled, discouraged, disobedient!
One writer has said, “In my lifelong study of the Bible I have looked for an overarching theme, a summary statement of what the whole sprawling book is about. I have settled on this: “God gets his family back.” From the first book to the last the Bible tells of wayward children and the tortuous lengths to which God will go to bring them home. Indeed, the entire biblical drama ends with a huge family reunion in the book of Revelation.”
But even when God gets his family back… messy can still erupt! The same is true in God’s redemptive work in our lives through Christ. Our redemption does not mean we won’t, at times, find ourselves living in a season of disobedience. It is messy because as the redeemed we are to be walking in the ways of God. Check out Galatians 6:1,2 on how we are to handle messy Christians.
Got any messy chapters in your walk with Christ? What do those chapters look like?
Praying for anyone who is a Christian and they are in a messy chapter?
Redemption means holiness matters.
Whether in the Old Testament or New Testament a follower could look back and see the date, the event that was the moment of their redemption. However a moment in time results in a journey of a lifetime where God works out His redemptive purposes in our lives. Think of the purchase of a house. There is the transfer of ownership - redemption. But then what often happens is that new owner goes from room to room – “redeeming” each room - aligning what that room looks like with the new owner. God works out his redemptive purposes in our lives - room by room, day by day, and chapter by chapter. This is a lifelong journey. Holiness matters.
One writer has said “…there is the tendency to overlook the fact that the NT as well as the OT sees redemption, or salvation, in terms of the total human situation.”
We have other theological words that expand on this- sanctification, transformation, renewal.
Eugene Peterson points out that “the root meaning in Hebrew of salvation is to be broad, to become spacious, to enlarge. It carries the sense of deliverance from an existence that has become compressed, confined and cramped.” It is a working out of new ownership!
Because the children of Israel are redeemed, they are now being held to account for their disobedience. There are all kinds of rooms in the “house” that do not reflect the new ownership. This will involve specific repentance for the decrees, commands and instructions that they have ignored. Note v6, 7. Our holiness matters to God because we are a redeemed people.
The same is true in the NT. Jesus walks through the “house” He owns and challenges us to align each “room” with who He is, not the previous owner. He desires to work out his redemptive purposes in every area of our lives.
Got any locked doors into rooms you know you need to allow God to redeem? In title He is the owner but in practice we need to acknowledge that fact.
Have you opened any doors lately where you could say that something is deeply broken but is being fixed?
Praying for anyone these days, praying that they would unlock a certain door?
Redemption is based on the work of God.
Whether we are referring to that moment in time when God redeemed us and transferred our ownership to Himself or to the ongoing process of redemption, God’s strength and power are essential! Note how v.10 refers to God’s strength. Also note v6,11. Nehemiah realizes that unless God “shows up”, nobody is getting fixed.
How many of us could identify a situation (personal or involving someone else) where you would say “unless they experience the power of God, the work of God, they may not get free!”
What happens when we fail to realize how necessary God’s strength is in redeeming people’s lives? This may apply to someone coming to faith or walking out their faith (one answer is that we can push people away because our desire to help actually hinders).
Because Nehemiah realized his need for the power of God, what did he do? For a clue, what one word summarizes what Nehemiah is doing from v.5-11?
Here is how I would sum up our big idea - God is a Redeemer Who is in the mess, challenging us on issues of holiness, and Who is present with power!
As you pray this week, engage with God our great and awesome Covenant Keeper (week 1) and Redeemer!
Mark Kotchapaw
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Friday, February 6, 2015
Touching Base - Part 264
FEBRUARY 8, 2015
NEHEMIAH, PART 1
BUILDING WALLS, RESTORING LIVES
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Plant your index finger on any continent you wish on a map of the world and you will discover a theme, a common thread that connects all that have life - brokenness. There is no Utopia, no perfect paradise, no state or condition that exists that has perfection as its logo. Now travel back in time, and with the exception of the perfect zoo in Genesis 1 and 2, you find that brokenness is very much rooted in our history!
Take a moment and talk about how you would define “brokenness” and where you see it most in your travels these days. Think of the categories of city, nation and world.
Now think more personally. Have you ever prayed a prayer that sounds something like, “Oh God, fix…..”
Describe your feelings that are associated with your thoughts of brokenness as seen in the world or in your own life.
What is your response to the brokenness around you or in you?
What is a picture that best represents the brokenness that most heavily burdens your heart these days?
TEXT: NEHEMIAH 1:1-11
Today we are starting a new series in the book of Nehemiah. For the next two weeks we are going to look at two names of God that surface in Nehemiah’s prayer in v.5-11. We need to know that, yes, our world is broken, but YES, God has a heart for restoration.
As we get started, read the chapter and answer the following questions:
- How would you define the brokenness that was being described?
- What emotions are in this text?
- What is the response of Nehemiah beyond just emotion?
- What is the picture?
- What do you remember from what I said on Sunday about historical context?
As we think of this issue of restoration, we need to understand (like Nehemiah) that God has a heart for restoration. In this prayer of Nehemiah, the first name we see that tells us God wants to restore is found in v.5.
GOD IS A COVENANT KEEPER!
Note the sandwich - in verse 5, Nehemiah declares that God is great and awesome. The walls are a mess, the people are weeping, but God is great. What is an example of that greatness? GOD IS A COVENANT KEEPER! So on top of this sandwich you have the character of God - great and awesome, in the middle you have the fact that he keeps his covenant or promise and on the bottom you have another reference to his character- it is a covenant of love. In Hebrew this is the word “hesed” - unfailing love.
Then note that as in all covenants there are two sides, note v.5b - but then read v6-9 - and note the contrast of the hesed posture of God and the sinful posture of the people.
They are in a mess because of what they did to themselves AND because of what others have done to them. They had parents that messed up and thus the exile, and now they the kids are paying the price and no doubt have sin issues themselves. FYI their captivity lasted around 70 years.
Note Nehemiah knows he is not talking to a wall. He knows that God is a covenant keeper and that he will listen and that if the people respond God will gather his people. God has a heart for restoration.
Let me give you three takeaways that you can discuss and pray into as you think about this issue of restoration.
1. COVENANT REMINDS US OF WHOSE WE ARE.
When someone entered into a covenant, say with a king, there would be the preamble or introduction, in which the great king is introduced with all his titles and attributes. In the book of covenant – Exodus - we see this pattern. The first 19 chapters establish who God is - He is a Savior and deliverer and then the requirements of the covenant are given - read Ex 20:1, 2 and then note how it moves into the commands.
We see this same pattern in the New Covenant. For example in Romans the first eleven chapters focus on the wonderful salvation God has provided in Jesus - deliverance. Note Paul’s response in Romans 11:33-36. Then in Romans 12:1 Paul’s says “Therefore…..” In light of who God is, our great King, we are to offer up our lives in complete surrender.
Note how the covenant reminds us of Whose we are. How important is it to remember Whose we are in this process of restoration? Covenant gets our eyes of our “walls” and onto our God. I like what John Newton said, “Although my memory's fading, I remember two things very clearly: I am a great sinner and Christ is a great Savior.” When we understand Whose we are, the possibilities for restoration, healing and hope arise within!
2. COVENANT REMINDS US OF WHO WE ARE.
Go back to v.5 - This is a covenant of ……. Love - We are the objects of that love! In other words, this great and awesome God loves this at-times-not-so-great-and-awesome person.
When we are walking in brokenness, what or who is shaping our identity?
Is it possible that our broken walls have defined who we are? It is possible that are “broken walls” have shaped what we think about God, ourselves and others?
Think about the following:
Our brokenness can become our ID card.
How does this happen?
What are examples of this?
Note how this great and awesome God of the Old Testament sounds a lot like the God of the New Testament - Romans 5:8! I wonder why that is?
Take some time to pray into this issue. For many, it is their brokenness that shapes their ID, not their great and awesome God.
3. COVENANT REMINDS US OF HOW WE ARE TO LIVE
Note in v.7 and 8 the words commands and instructions. They had walked away from the commands and instructions of God. Jeremiah 2:13 provides a great picture of what this looks like. We have deep thirst and God’s truth is what truly sets us free.
If we are going to embark on the journey of restoration then we must embark on the journey of replacing the lies with God’s truth. Whether we have had people mess up our lives or we have done it all ourselves, truth is imperative in the healing journey. That truth begins with Jesus. Remember what Jesus said in the New Testament? ” I am the Way, the Truth and the Life…..”
As a group, brainstorm on various biblical truths that are crucial to the restorative journey then pray into those people and places that you would love to see restored.
This is one of Nehemiah’s nine prayers in this book. He will pray again, he will weep again. No journey involves one prayer or one tear. Let’s travel with Nehemiah as we journey together and rebuild the “walls”!
Mark Kotchapaw
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
NEHEMIAH, PART 1
BUILDING WALLS, RESTORING LIVES
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Plant your index finger on any continent you wish on a map of the world and you will discover a theme, a common thread that connects all that have life - brokenness. There is no Utopia, no perfect paradise, no state or condition that exists that has perfection as its logo. Now travel back in time, and with the exception of the perfect zoo in Genesis 1 and 2, you find that brokenness is very much rooted in our history!
Take a moment and talk about how you would define “brokenness” and where you see it most in your travels these days. Think of the categories of city, nation and world.
Now think more personally. Have you ever prayed a prayer that sounds something like, “Oh God, fix…..”
Describe your feelings that are associated with your thoughts of brokenness as seen in the world or in your own life.
What is your response to the brokenness around you or in you?
What is a picture that best represents the brokenness that most heavily burdens your heart these days?
TEXT: NEHEMIAH 1:1-11
Today we are starting a new series in the book of Nehemiah. For the next two weeks we are going to look at two names of God that surface in Nehemiah’s prayer in v.5-11. We need to know that, yes, our world is broken, but YES, God has a heart for restoration.
As we get started, read the chapter and answer the following questions:
- How would you define the brokenness that was being described?
- What emotions are in this text?
- What is the response of Nehemiah beyond just emotion?
- What is the picture?
- What do you remember from what I said on Sunday about historical context?
As we think of this issue of restoration, we need to understand (like Nehemiah) that God has a heart for restoration. In this prayer of Nehemiah, the first name we see that tells us God wants to restore is found in v.5.
GOD IS A COVENANT KEEPER!
Note the sandwich - in verse 5, Nehemiah declares that God is great and awesome. The walls are a mess, the people are weeping, but God is great. What is an example of that greatness? GOD IS A COVENANT KEEPER! So on top of this sandwich you have the character of God - great and awesome, in the middle you have the fact that he keeps his covenant or promise and on the bottom you have another reference to his character- it is a covenant of love. In Hebrew this is the word “hesed” - unfailing love.
Then note that as in all covenants there are two sides, note v.5b - but then read v6-9 - and note the contrast of the hesed posture of God and the sinful posture of the people.
They are in a mess because of what they did to themselves AND because of what others have done to them. They had parents that messed up and thus the exile, and now they the kids are paying the price and no doubt have sin issues themselves. FYI their captivity lasted around 70 years.
Note Nehemiah knows he is not talking to a wall. He knows that God is a covenant keeper and that he will listen and that if the people respond God will gather his people. God has a heart for restoration.
Let me give you three takeaways that you can discuss and pray into as you think about this issue of restoration.
1. COVENANT REMINDS US OF WHOSE WE ARE.
When someone entered into a covenant, say with a king, there would be the preamble or introduction, in which the great king is introduced with all his titles and attributes. In the book of covenant – Exodus - we see this pattern. The first 19 chapters establish who God is - He is a Savior and deliverer and then the requirements of the covenant are given - read Ex 20:1, 2 and then note how it moves into the commands.
We see this same pattern in the New Covenant. For example in Romans the first eleven chapters focus on the wonderful salvation God has provided in Jesus - deliverance. Note Paul’s response in Romans 11:33-36. Then in Romans 12:1 Paul’s says “Therefore…..” In light of who God is, our great King, we are to offer up our lives in complete surrender.
Note how the covenant reminds us of Whose we are. How important is it to remember Whose we are in this process of restoration? Covenant gets our eyes of our “walls” and onto our God. I like what John Newton said, “Although my memory's fading, I remember two things very clearly: I am a great sinner and Christ is a great Savior.” When we understand Whose we are, the possibilities for restoration, healing and hope arise within!
2. COVENANT REMINDS US OF WHO WE ARE.
Go back to v.5 - This is a covenant of ……. Love - We are the objects of that love! In other words, this great and awesome God loves this at-times-not-so-great-and-awesome person.
When we are walking in brokenness, what or who is shaping our identity?
Is it possible that our broken walls have defined who we are? It is possible that are “broken walls” have shaped what we think about God, ourselves and others?
Think about the following:
Our brokenness can become our ID card.
How does this happen?
What are examples of this?
Note how this great and awesome God of the Old Testament sounds a lot like the God of the New Testament - Romans 5:8! I wonder why that is?
Take some time to pray into this issue. For many, it is their brokenness that shapes their ID, not their great and awesome God.
3. COVENANT REMINDS US OF HOW WE ARE TO LIVE
Note in v.7 and 8 the words commands and instructions. They had walked away from the commands and instructions of God. Jeremiah 2:13 provides a great picture of what this looks like. We have deep thirst and God’s truth is what truly sets us free.
If we are going to embark on the journey of restoration then we must embark on the journey of replacing the lies with God’s truth. Whether we have had people mess up our lives or we have done it all ourselves, truth is imperative in the healing journey. That truth begins with Jesus. Remember what Jesus said in the New Testament? ” I am the Way, the Truth and the Life…..”
As a group, brainstorm on various biblical truths that are crucial to the restorative journey then pray into those people and places that you would love to see restored.
This is one of Nehemiah’s nine prayers in this book. He will pray again, he will weep again. No journey involves one prayer or one tear. Let’s travel with Nehemiah as we journey together and rebuild the “walls”!
Mark Kotchapaw
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Saturday, January 31, 2015
Touching Base - Part 263
Sunday, February 1st, 2015
Part 4 - Flying Solo: Singleness and the Church
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Kick off the Conversation:
- Reflect & share whether singleness was part of the dialogue in your experience as you grew up. If it was…why was it? If it wasn’t, why not?
- Reflect on your ethnic background. Are there any cultural expectations around marriage or singleness?
- How have these things shaped your understanding today?
Before we start to talk about singleness and marriage, it is helpful to frame HOW we are going to talk about it. We need to create the space to be free of judgement of ourselves or each other or any bitterness from our experience as we talk about this. We all have assumptions that we operate from but we often don’t realize that we have them. It is my hope that this discussion will bring awareness to those assumptions, and change them where we feel convicted. So as we talk about this PRAY TOGETHER that you have the posture to listen to each other and understand one another’s experience.
There are many mixed messages in the church today around singleness. A few are mentioned below:
1. They want to be married and so they are discontent with being single.
2. They want to be married so they must idolize marriage.
3. They aren't married because they are too picky.
4. They aren't married because they have things they need to work on.
5. They aren't married because they are called to be single.
Are there any other assumptions that either you have made or you have experienced? Share these with the group.
Look at some examples of men and women who were single for different reasons and different seasons. We mentioned Adam. We have Joseph, who though pursued by the wife of Potiphar…fled temptation and ended up wrongfully in prison. And we have Moses, who the Lord drew to Himself in the years of tending sheep and eventually in the meeting at the Burning Bush. We also have two widows, Ruth & Naomi. Then we have John the Baptist – whose life and call was to prepare the way for the Lord! Then we have the prophetess Anna, who was married for seven years, and then spent the rest of her days waiting in the temple. Jesus, and of course, Paul. Are there individuals in this list that teach you something specific about what it means to be single well? Share this with your group.
Turn to Genesis 2:15-19 – read together.
Did you catch that? God states that it wasn’t good for the man to be alone – but he gives him the task of naming the animals while he was alone! In other words: there is a task that Adam has to do alone. A task that the Lord has specifically given him – a lofty task to name the animals. One other note: do you think that as those animals came to him, they weren’t male & female? Adam, engaging in the task that the Lord has for him as a single man, actually exposes his need for a companion! Isn’t that fascinating! There the Lord left Adam to “fly solo”, as it were, in the task that He had for him. There was a specific job, pursuit, or hobby that needed to be done as a single person.
Read Psalm 119: 9–16.
We are all called to pursue the LORD as first in our heart. We are not called to marriage, to marriage or singleness, we are called to Christ.
- What would a single-hearted pursuit of the LORD mean for your life today? Would something have to change? Be practical and real here.
- If you are married, share how this can be difficult when you have the “anxieties” that Paul talks about.
Read 1 Corinthians 7.
Look at verse 6 of chapter 7: “Now as a concession, not a command, I say this: I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.” There is no other way to interpret this: each state is a gift. Marriage is a gift and singleness is a gift. But I realize that a large portion of us who are single don’t feel that it is a gift…and there are those who are married who also don’t feel like it is a gift. But do not buy into this cultural assumption that our feelings establish our truth. No: the Bible is where we find our truth. And the truth is stated here: each state (marriage or singleness) is a gift... whether we feel it is or not.
- How would seeing your current state (married or single) as a gift change how you experience it?
We also need to guard and care for the gift God has given us. A large part of this involves purity.
- How does purity fit into your present state? Physical purity is a more obvious one. What about emotional or spiritual purity? How can we encourage each other and guard each other’s hearts in the area of purity?
NOW WHAT?
- Honest reflection: who are the singles (“never-been-marrieds”, divorced or widows) in your life? Picture the faces of those you know. Now…how integrated is your life when it comes to your community? Your campus groups? Your small group? Your work colleagues? Is there a mix of married and single people as part of those who you do life with?
- What are some practical, small ways that you could reach out to these individuals? An idea would be to send an encouraging card. Or invite them over for a meal. Brainstorm other ideas together. Commit to doing something DIFFERENT this week and follow up with your group next week.
- ASK!!!! We have learned that assumptions can really be hurtful. Ask those in your life how they can be supported and helped.
Amanda Van Halteren
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Part 4 - Flying Solo: Singleness and the Church
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Kick off the Conversation:
- Reflect & share whether singleness was part of the dialogue in your experience as you grew up. If it was…why was it? If it wasn’t, why not?
- Reflect on your ethnic background. Are there any cultural expectations around marriage or singleness?
- How have these things shaped your understanding today?
Before we start to talk about singleness and marriage, it is helpful to frame HOW we are going to talk about it. We need to create the space to be free of judgement of ourselves or each other or any bitterness from our experience as we talk about this. We all have assumptions that we operate from but we often don’t realize that we have them. It is my hope that this discussion will bring awareness to those assumptions, and change them where we feel convicted. So as we talk about this PRAY TOGETHER that you have the posture to listen to each other and understand one another’s experience.
There are many mixed messages in the church today around singleness. A few are mentioned below:
1. They want to be married and so they are discontent with being single.
2. They want to be married so they must idolize marriage.
3. They aren't married because they are too picky.
4. They aren't married because they have things they need to work on.
5. They aren't married because they are called to be single.
Are there any other assumptions that either you have made or you have experienced? Share these with the group.
Look at some examples of men and women who were single for different reasons and different seasons. We mentioned Adam. We have Joseph, who though pursued by the wife of Potiphar…fled temptation and ended up wrongfully in prison. And we have Moses, who the Lord drew to Himself in the years of tending sheep and eventually in the meeting at the Burning Bush. We also have two widows, Ruth & Naomi. Then we have John the Baptist – whose life and call was to prepare the way for the Lord! Then we have the prophetess Anna, who was married for seven years, and then spent the rest of her days waiting in the temple. Jesus, and of course, Paul. Are there individuals in this list that teach you something specific about what it means to be single well? Share this with your group.
Turn to Genesis 2:15-19 – read together.
Did you catch that? God states that it wasn’t good for the man to be alone – but he gives him the task of naming the animals while he was alone! In other words: there is a task that Adam has to do alone. A task that the Lord has specifically given him – a lofty task to name the animals. One other note: do you think that as those animals came to him, they weren’t male & female? Adam, engaging in the task that the Lord has for him as a single man, actually exposes his need for a companion! Isn’t that fascinating! There the Lord left Adam to “fly solo”, as it were, in the task that He had for him. There was a specific job, pursuit, or hobby that needed to be done as a single person.
Read Psalm 119: 9–16.
We are all called to pursue the LORD as first in our heart. We are not called to marriage, to marriage or singleness, we are called to Christ.
- What would a single-hearted pursuit of the LORD mean for your life today? Would something have to change? Be practical and real here.
- If you are married, share how this can be difficult when you have the “anxieties” that Paul talks about.
Read 1 Corinthians 7.
Look at verse 6 of chapter 7: “Now as a concession, not a command, I say this: I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.” There is no other way to interpret this: each state is a gift. Marriage is a gift and singleness is a gift. But I realize that a large portion of us who are single don’t feel that it is a gift…and there are those who are married who also don’t feel like it is a gift. But do not buy into this cultural assumption that our feelings establish our truth. No: the Bible is where we find our truth. And the truth is stated here: each state (marriage or singleness) is a gift... whether we feel it is or not.
- How would seeing your current state (married or single) as a gift change how you experience it?
We also need to guard and care for the gift God has given us. A large part of this involves purity.
- How does purity fit into your present state? Physical purity is a more obvious one. What about emotional or spiritual purity? How can we encourage each other and guard each other’s hearts in the area of purity?
NOW WHAT?
- Honest reflection: who are the singles (“never-been-marrieds”, divorced or widows) in your life? Picture the faces of those you know. Now…how integrated is your life when it comes to your community? Your campus groups? Your small group? Your work colleagues? Is there a mix of married and single people as part of those who you do life with?
- What are some practical, small ways that you could reach out to these individuals? An idea would be to send an encouraging card. Or invite them over for a meal. Brainstorm other ideas together. Commit to doing something DIFFERENT this week and follow up with your group next week.
- ASK!!!! We have learned that assumptions can really be hurtful. Ask those in your life how they can be supported and helped.
Amanda Van Halteren
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Touching Base - Part 262
SUNDAY, JANUARY 25th, 2015
CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS, PART 3
DYING WELL IS LIVING WELL
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
1. Living as mortals in the light of our mortality in a world that would deny it:
Psalm 49
Ecclesiastes 7
2. Living as Christians in the light of our DYING with a God that demands it:
Luke 9: 23-26
Micah 6:5-6
“But we all suffer. For we all prize and love; and in this present existence of ours, prizing and loving yield suffering. Love in our world is suffering love. Some do not suffer much, though, for they do not love much. Suffering is for the loving. This, said Jesus, is the command of the Holy One: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." In commanding us to love, God invites us to suffer.” ― Nicholas Wolterstorff, Lament for a Son
3. Living our mission by caring for the dying - the message of Resurrection Hope:
Isaiah 60:22
1 Peter 3:15-16
Psalm 49:15
Matthew 25:35-40
“Some want to live within the sound
Of church or chapel bell;
I want to run a rescue shop,
Within a yard of hell.”
C.T. Studd
Dr. Ivan Stewart
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
RESOURCES:
Christian Medical and Dental Society https://www.cmdscanada.org
https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/143026-lament-for-a-son
Brock, Ira. Dying Well. Riverhead Trade: ISBN 978-1573226578
Kuhl, David. What Dying People Want. Anchor Canada: ISBN 978-0385658843
Lewis, C.S. A Grief Observed. Faber and Faber Ltd.: ISBN 978-0571290680
Moll, Rob. The Art of Dying. Pariyatti Publishing: 978-1928706359
Vanouken, Sheldon. A Severe Mercy. Harper one, ISBN 978-0060688240
Wolterstorff, Nicholas. Lament For a Son. Eerdman’s: ISBN 978-0802802941
CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS, PART 3
DYING WELL IS LIVING WELL
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
1. Living as mortals in the light of our mortality in a world that would deny it:
Psalm 49
Ecclesiastes 7
2. Living as Christians in the light of our DYING with a God that demands it:
Luke 9: 23-26
Micah 6:5-6
“But we all suffer. For we all prize and love; and in this present existence of ours, prizing and loving yield suffering. Love in our world is suffering love. Some do not suffer much, though, for they do not love much. Suffering is for the loving. This, said Jesus, is the command of the Holy One: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." In commanding us to love, God invites us to suffer.” ― Nicholas Wolterstorff, Lament for a Son
3. Living our mission by caring for the dying - the message of Resurrection Hope:
Isaiah 60:22
1 Peter 3:15-16
Psalm 49:15
Matthew 25:35-40
“Some want to live within the sound
Of church or chapel bell;
I want to run a rescue shop,
Within a yard of hell.”
C.T. Studd
Dr. Ivan Stewart
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
RESOURCES:
Christian Medical and Dental Society https://www.cmdscanada.org
https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/143026-lament-for-a-son
Brock, Ira. Dying Well. Riverhead Trade: ISBN 978-1573226578
Kuhl, David. What Dying People Want. Anchor Canada: ISBN 978-0385658843
Lewis, C.S. A Grief Observed. Faber and Faber Ltd.: ISBN 978-0571290680
Moll, Rob. The Art of Dying. Pariyatti Publishing: 978-1928706359
Vanouken, Sheldon. A Severe Mercy. Harper one, ISBN 978-0060688240
Wolterstorff, Nicholas. Lament For a Son. Eerdman’s: ISBN 978-0802802941
Friday, January 16, 2015
Touching Base - Part 261
SUNDAY, JANUARY 18th, 2015
CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS, PART 2
BROKEN PEOPLE, BROKEN GOD?
Kent Bandy
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Is God busted? If you look at His people, does it resound with “Wow, He must be really something!”
As Christ followers, we always need to come back to the word of God to be reminded of God’s changeless truth and we need to be willing to wrestle with the implications in the complex, pluralistic culture in which we live. When it comes to brokenness, most of us can see that our culture is full of it. But why is the church full of it if God is so amazing?
Let me outline my talk on Sunday, and then I encourage you to wrestle with the many implications of putting feet to God’s truth in 2015. Welcome to the second of a four-part series in Crucial Conversations.
Big Idea: This is not “as good as it gets”.
You don’t have to be a rocket-scientist to notice the brokenness in the church. Why is it there if God is so incredible? The reality for most of us is that our need for Jesus as Saviour is far deeper than we realize. If that’s true, then our need for restoration also goes far deeper that we know. The need is real, but do we not see it, or just not know how to go there?
In the Bible we read of God “saving us” in many places. In fact, as Mark pointed out last week, our Bible is laid out in terms of a covenant, the Old Testament/Covenant and the New Testament/Covenant. There are several examples of covenants being made that include friendship, national and international relationships. These could be called horizontal covenants. Then there are vertical covenants between God and man. This definitely involved the Greater coming into relationship with the lesser; the Creator versus His creation.
The root word in the Bible for salvation is the Greek “sozo”: (it appears over 100 times in the New Testament)
- to save, keep safe and sound, to rescue from danger or destruction a one (from injury or peril),
to save a suffering one (from perishing), i.e. one suffering from disease, to make well, heal, restore to health, to preserve one who is in danger of destruction, to save or rescue.
(Thayer and Smith. "Sozo", in The NAS New Testament Greek Lexicon,1999)
The heart of salvation is to be saved (rescued) and healed (restored).
Ever since sin entered God’s people, His desire has been to rescue them and heal them. Throughout the Old Covenant he promised His forgiveness, rescue, healing, deliverance and restoration.
Check out the following texts:
Psalm 103:3-6
Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
Note the promise of restoration.
Isaiah 53:5
But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.
Isaiah 61:1-4
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.
They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations.
Note the progression of this: first, the Saviour comes to bring God’s restoration to the broken. Then the broken, having been restored, become testimonies of God’s glory who then go and give to other people what the Saviour gave to them. The restoration they bring will renew places that have been dead for generations – that’s a long time!
So this suggests that what we give to others is something we have experienced firsthand from God himself. We duplicate or reproduce who we are. If we experience Gods restoration then we pass that on to others.
Luke 4:16-20
He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. He stood up to read, and the scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written: “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him. He began by saying to them, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”
Notice that Jesus states Himself that He is fulfilling the words spoken through Isaiah the prophet. The promised restoration is not only becoming a reality, but all of the promises come with it.
Now what?
Here are some questions for further discussion:
- What do you think holds us back from experiencing the whole of what Jesus offers?
- What role does fear play in your estimation?
- What role (if any) do “simple answers” play in holding us back?
- What role does not facing the reality of our lives play?
- How serious is that reality?
- Do we see any chaos, messiness or complexity in taking disciple-making to a deeper level?
- What could be the implications if we were to see people demonstrate a greater level of change in Christ?
- If you were to believe that Jesus can heal our deepest brokenness, what would you want Him to rebuild in you first?
Take some time to pray into the issues raised. We need grace and truth as we have these crucial conversations.
Kent Bandy
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS, PART 2
BROKEN PEOPLE, BROKEN GOD?
Kent Bandy
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Is God busted? If you look at His people, does it resound with “Wow, He must be really something!”
As Christ followers, we always need to come back to the word of God to be reminded of God’s changeless truth and we need to be willing to wrestle with the implications in the complex, pluralistic culture in which we live. When it comes to brokenness, most of us can see that our culture is full of it. But why is the church full of it if God is so amazing?
Let me outline my talk on Sunday, and then I encourage you to wrestle with the many implications of putting feet to God’s truth in 2015. Welcome to the second of a four-part series in Crucial Conversations.
Big Idea: This is not “as good as it gets”.
You don’t have to be a rocket-scientist to notice the brokenness in the church. Why is it there if God is so incredible? The reality for most of us is that our need for Jesus as Saviour is far deeper than we realize. If that’s true, then our need for restoration also goes far deeper that we know. The need is real, but do we not see it, or just not know how to go there?
In the Bible we read of God “saving us” in many places. In fact, as Mark pointed out last week, our Bible is laid out in terms of a covenant, the Old Testament/Covenant and the New Testament/Covenant. There are several examples of covenants being made that include friendship, national and international relationships. These could be called horizontal covenants. Then there are vertical covenants between God and man. This definitely involved the Greater coming into relationship with the lesser; the Creator versus His creation.
The root word in the Bible for salvation is the Greek “sozo”: (it appears over 100 times in the New Testament)
- to save, keep safe and sound, to rescue from danger or destruction a one (from injury or peril),
to save a suffering one (from perishing), i.e. one suffering from disease, to make well, heal, restore to health, to preserve one who is in danger of destruction, to save or rescue.
(Thayer and Smith. "Sozo", in The NAS New Testament Greek Lexicon,1999)
The heart of salvation is to be saved (rescued) and healed (restored).
Ever since sin entered God’s people, His desire has been to rescue them and heal them. Throughout the Old Covenant he promised His forgiveness, rescue, healing, deliverance and restoration.
Check out the following texts:
Psalm 103:3-6
Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
Note the promise of restoration.
Isaiah 53:5
But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.
Isaiah 61:1-4
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.
They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations.
Note the progression of this: first, the Saviour comes to bring God’s restoration to the broken. Then the broken, having been restored, become testimonies of God’s glory who then go and give to other people what the Saviour gave to them. The restoration they bring will renew places that have been dead for generations – that’s a long time!
So this suggests that what we give to others is something we have experienced firsthand from God himself. We duplicate or reproduce who we are. If we experience Gods restoration then we pass that on to others.
Luke 4:16-20
He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. He stood up to read, and the scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written: “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him. He began by saying to them, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”
Notice that Jesus states Himself that He is fulfilling the words spoken through Isaiah the prophet. The promised restoration is not only becoming a reality, but all of the promises come with it.
Now what?
Here are some questions for further discussion:
- What do you think holds us back from experiencing the whole of what Jesus offers?
- What role does fear play in your estimation?
- What role (if any) do “simple answers” play in holding us back?
- What role does not facing the reality of our lives play?
- How serious is that reality?
- Do we see any chaos, messiness or complexity in taking disciple-making to a deeper level?
- What could be the implications if we were to see people demonstrate a greater level of change in Christ?
- If you were to believe that Jesus can heal our deepest brokenness, what would you want Him to rebuild in you first?
Take some time to pray into the issues raised. We need grace and truth as we have these crucial conversations.
Kent Bandy
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
Thursday, January 8, 2015
Touching Base - Part 260
SUNDAY, JANUARY 11th, 2015
PART 1
MARRIAGE GLUE
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Talk about a crucial conversation. We have all kinds of views regarding what marriage actually is these days, even whether it’s important or necessary. Why not discard something that is so old? Isn’t it time to move on, move out and discover what is next to be revealed by our own human brilliance?
As Christ followers, we always need to come back to the word of God to be reminded of God’s changeless truth and we need to be willing to wrestle with the implications in the complex, pluralistic culture in which we live. When it comes to marriage, the carnage is great and the pain is immeasurable so we need to trod carefully (but biblically) as we ponder such an important topic.
Let me outline what I talked about on Sunday, and then I encourage you to wrestle with the many implications of living out God’s truth in 2015. Welcome to the first of a four-part series in Crucial Conversations.
Big Idea: The Glue of Marriage is Covenant.
Yes of course there is love and romance and wonder and heart palpitations but the glue is covenant.
In the Bible we read of “covenant making” in many places. In fact, our Bible is laid out in terms of a covenant, the Old Testament/Covenant and the New Testament/Covenant. There are several examples of covenants being made that include friendship, national and international relationships. These could be called horizontal covenants. Then there are vertical covenants between God and man. This definitely involved the Greater coming into relationship with the lesser; the Creator versus His creation.
The two key words in the Bible for covenant or alliance are the Heb. “berîṯ” and the Greek “diathēkē”:
- “Berîṯ” usually refers to the act or rite of the making of a covenant and also to the standing contract between two partners, like binding yourself together through a legal document
- “Diathēkē” – the root meaning of this Greek word is “to set something out in order”
The essence of covenant is to be found in a particular kind of relationship between persons.
You can see a covenant format in the books of Exodus (known as The Book of Covenant) and Deuteronomy where there are clear expectations laid out in terms of man’s relationship with God. One writer has said “There is no firmer guarantee of legal security, peace or personal loyalty than the covenant” (TDNT, II, p. 115; cf. Amos 1:9).
In the New Testament/Covenant you read of guidelines, and truths that outline the relationship between people and God.
Marriage is also a relationship that involves covenant.
Check out the following texts:
Genesis 2:22-25
The word “united” in v. 24 is a Hebrew word that literally means “to be glued to something”. Elsewhere in the bible, “unite” means to unite to someone through a covenant, a binding promise or an oath. The word elsewhere is used to describe a covenantal commitment to God (cf. Deut. 10:20). Vows, promises made before men and God were powerful. It wasn’t like saying you will show up for a 4pm meeting then forgetting. Read Deuteronomy 23:21-22; Psalm 15:4; 76:11. The covenant was foundational and binding.
Note that in our text, becoming one flesh took place within the context of covenant. In Jewish culture this text was the foundational understanding of marriage. Safe, healthy, happy sex took place within a marital covenant. To remove sexual union from the context of a covenant was to defile the marriage bed. See Hebrews 4:13
It was not sex that equaled a marriage but covenant that established the binding foundation of that marriage which was expressed through sexual union.
Malachi 2:13 14,15 (see also Proverbs 2:17)
Note again the idea of covenant and what the people were guilty of.
One writer has said, “The covenant made between a husband and a wife is done ‘before God’ and therefore with God as well as the spouse. To break faith with your spouse is to break faith with God at the same time.”
Matthew 19:3-9
Note what Jesus does in referencing marriage. He goes back to the beginning. Like in Malachi, the people were guilty of devaluing marriage. Jesus reminds them of covenant and its foundational and binding role in a marriage.
Ephesians 5:22-33
Notice that Paul also goes back to the beginning (Genesis) and, like Jesus and Malachi, is raising the bar on the value, foundation and permanence of marriage. But notice another way he elevates marriage - all throughout this text he is paralleling the relationship of a husband and wife to Christ and the church – v.32 and v.25 - What word characterizes Christ’s relationship to the church? Covenant. In other words the marriage covenant is a picture of the gospel.
“Paul saw that when God designed the original marriage, He already had Christ and the church in mind. This is one of God’s great purposes in marriage: to picture the relationship between Christ and this redeemed people forever!” (Timothy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage, p.46)
Now what?
Here are some questions for further discussion:
- What would the sexual practices of our culture say about this order of affairs - covenant and then sexual union? What would the sexual practices of our church say about the order of affairs - covenant and then sexual union?
- Could a child be better off if her parents had thought about commitment/covenant first before sexual union?
- Do we see any chaos, messiness or complexity in our culture and church because of low regard for covenant?
- In light of this teaching on covenant, what do you say to someone who is a Christ follower and who is having sexual relations outside of a covenant?
- Does sexual union equal covenant?
- With this understanding of the power of a covenant what is the basis of annulling a marriage if there has not been sexual union?
- If you are married how does your marriage, being a picture of the Gospel, impact how you treat each other?
Take some time to pray into the issues raised. We need grace and truth as we have these crucial conversations.
Mark
If interested in joining or starting a small group contact bethelcommunitygroups@gmail.com
PART 1
MARRIAGE GLUE
This is a useful tool for small group discussion, personal reflection or in a one-on-one conversation. We believe that if the Sunday teaching is discussed outside the morning services, it will be an opportunity to go deeper and build community because God's Word needs to be discussed in community.
Talk about a crucial conversation. We have all kinds of views regarding what marriage actually is these days, even whether it’s important or necessary. Why not discard something that is so old? Isn’t it time to move on, move out and discover what is next to be revealed by our own human brilliance?
As Christ followers, we always need to come back to the word of God to be reminded of God’s changeless truth and we need to be willing to wrestle with the implications in the complex, pluralistic culture in which we live. When it comes to marriage, the carnage is great and the pain is immeasurable so we need to trod carefully (but biblically) as we ponder such an important topic.
Let me outline what I talked about on Sunday, and then I encourage you to wrestle with the many implications of living out God’s truth in 2015. Welcome to the first of a four-part series in Crucial Conversations.
Big Idea: The Glue of Marriage is Covenant.
Yes of course there is love and romance and wonder and heart palpitations but the glue is covenant.
In the Bible we read of “covenant making” in many places. In fact, our Bible is laid out in terms of a covenant, the Old Testament/Covenant and the New Testament/Covenant. There are several examples of covenants being made that include friendship, national and international relationships. These could be called horizontal covenants. Then there are vertical covenants between God and man. This definitely involved the Greater coming into relationship with the lesser; the Creator versus His creation.
The two key words in the Bible for covenant or alliance are the Heb. “berîṯ” and the Greek “diathēkē”:
- “Berîṯ” usually refers to the act or rite of the making of a covenant and also to the standing contract between two partners, like binding yourself together through a legal document
- “Diathēkē” – the root meaning of this Greek word is “to set something out in order”
The essence of covenant is to be found in a particular kind of relationship between persons.
You can see a covenant format in the books of Exodus (known as The Book of Covenant) and Deuteronomy where there are clear expectations laid out in terms of man’s relationship with God. One writer has said “There is no firmer guarantee of legal security, peace or personal loyalty than the covenant” (TDNT, II, p. 115; cf. Amos 1:9).
In the New Testament/Covenant you read of guidelines, and truths that outline the relationship between people and God.
Marriage is also a relationship that involves covenant.
Check out the following texts:
Genesis 2:22-25
The word “united” in v. 24 is a Hebrew word that literally means “to be glued to something”. Elsewhere in the bible, “unite” means to unite to someone through a covenant, a binding promise or an oath. The word elsewhere is used to describe a covenantal commitment to God (cf. Deut. 10:20). Vows, promises made before men and God were powerful. It wasn’t like saying you will show up for a 4pm meeting then forgetting. Read Deuteronomy 23:21-22; Psalm 15:4; 76:11. The covenant was foundational and binding.
Note that in our text, becoming one flesh took place within the context of covenant. In Jewish culture this text was the foundational understanding of marriage. Safe, healthy, happy sex took place within a marital covenant. To remove sexual union from the context of a covenant was to defile the marriage bed. See Hebrews 4:13
It was not sex that equaled a marriage but covenant that established the binding foundation of that marriage which was expressed through sexual union.
Malachi 2:13 14,15 (see also Proverbs 2:17)
Note again the idea of covenant and what the people were guilty of.
One writer has said, “The covenant made between a husband and a wife is done ‘before God’ and therefore with God as well as the spouse. To break faith with your spouse is to break faith with God at the same time.”
Matthew 19:3-9
Note what Jesus does in referencing marriage. He goes back to the beginning. Like in Malachi, the people were guilty of devaluing marriage. Jesus reminds them of covenant and its foundational and binding role in a marriage.
Ephesians 5:22-33
Notice that Paul also goes back to the beginning (Genesis) and, like Jesus and Malachi, is raising the bar on the value, foundation and permanence of marriage. But notice another way he elevates marriage - all throughout this text he is paralleling the relationship of a husband and wife to Christ and the church – v.32 and v.25 - What word characterizes Christ’s relationship to the church? Covenant. In other words the marriage covenant is a picture of the gospel.
“Paul saw that when God designed the original marriage, He already had Christ and the church in mind. This is one of God’s great purposes in marriage: to picture the relationship between Christ and this redeemed people forever!” (Timothy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage, p.46)
Now what?
Here are some questions for further discussion:
- What would the sexual practices of our culture say about this order of affairs - covenant and then sexual union? What would the sexual practices of our church say about the order of affairs - covenant and then sexual union?
- Could a child be better off if her parents had thought about commitment/covenant first before sexual union?
- Do we see any chaos, messiness or complexity in our culture and church because of low regard for covenant?
- In light of this teaching on covenant, what do you say to someone who is a Christ follower and who is having sexual relations outside of a covenant?
- Does sexual union equal covenant?
- With this understanding of the power of a covenant what is the basis of annulling a marriage if there has not been sexual union?
- If you are married how does your marriage, being a picture of the Gospel, impact how you treat each other?
Take some time to pray into the issues raised. We need grace and truth as we have these crucial conversations.
Mark
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